“Icy Addiction of the Heart”

I am sober today,
In this world of grey,
Sober from my many addictions,
These pernicious afflictions,
But it seems to be,
That only my body is free,
For my addictions are at fingers tip,
Waiting for one foul slip,
I sit staring at this thing,
Feeling a hungering sting,
As my heart calls for it,
And my mind must bear the grit,
And resist my desires,
That rage like fires,
Why must I bear this iniquity,
Inside of me,
Why does all my joy hide,
When silent sin they glide,
This self destructive nature of my heart,
Lusting like self suicidal art,
Wanting what it shouldn’t have,
And not wanting the healing salve,

My soul is loath in me,
Bound in chains you can not see,
Bound in self wrought chains,
Forged links from the essence of pains,
Forged and self wrought in the night,
Poxing flesh like a blight,
So what if I am sober in body,
If deep inside where you can not see,
My heart still longs against sobriety,
And lusts for the kiss of iniquity,
Why Oh, Why did I ever let go,
To slide with the flow,
Down this icy river,
And leave the side of the merciful forgiver,
When chill made my flesh feel warm,
When in fact t'was a deathly storm,
Why did I not head the heavenly call,
Why did I have to fall,
For now the flow beats me down,
As I try to climb its crown,
Back up the mighty fall,
Barring my way like a wall,